Set Free

Ever been emotionally constipated, unable to experience the free flow feeling of being at ease with yourself and others? Ever wonder what causes us to constrain, constrict and bind ourselves up? There can be a variety of reasons including unforgiveness.

Unforgiveness can be a perpetrator of our dis-ease with self and others. And, it doesn’t work alone. Instead, unforgiveness, like a magnet, attracts other collaborating emotions. Just like magnetic material cannot resist the magnetic force, neither can other collaborators of unforgiveness resist the attracting force of unforgiveness.

When we are unable to forgive, unconscious of our need to forgive, or consciously choosing not to forgive, we can’t help but also collect and partner with resentment, anger, and blame. These emotions feel at home inside of us. If we can learn to live with our unforgiveness, we can also learn to live with what accompanies it. 

Holding onto our grudges, tempering our rage and trying hard not to accuse others while being in a state of unforgiveness is a full-time endeavor. Our attention is divided and dividing our attention can be constipating, painful, and stressful. Our pain and stress can’t help but affect our physical and emotional well-being. 

Unable to find resolve living with our unforgiveness and its collaborators we’ll feel broken and struggle to feel whole. We’ll overcompensate for feeling guilty and try hard to be good, kind and gracious around others. Though we want to forget about the one who wounded us in the first place, we keep dragging them along wherever we go. They are never far from us. 

Though physically exhausted, a peaceful sleep without the aid of drugs is nearly impossible. Our immune system may weaken, our bodies remain on high alert, and though we’d like ourselves to relax, the idea is almost preposterous. 

Everything we’d like for ourselves; rest, peace, and freedom from stress, is within our reach. But first, we have to believe that the value of forgiveness far exceeds the worth of unforgiveness. When we believe that, then we’ll let go of our unforgiveness and grab onto forgiveness. 

Why Bother?

Why bother letting forgiveness set you free? Unforgiveness is a perpetrator. Its crime; fooling us into thinking that living with it and its perpetrators is what we should do when someone hurts us. In actuality, forgiveness is what sets us free and heals us from our woundedness.

P.S.  I wrote the story of my journey to forgiveness for those who, like me, know they need to change, but are not quite sure where to start. You can find A Heart’s Journey To Forgiveness at Redemption Press and Amazon.