To Whom Do I Belong?

On my birth certificate Paul and Darleen Macek are listed as my parents. I was the sixth of their seven children, the last born daughter. 

Paul and Darleen took me home from the hospital to live with them as another child in their family. I was given the same last name of all my other siblings. Though my older brothers and sisters liked to tease me that I was adopted, I was not. I was a full fledged member of the Macek family.

I knew I belonged to that clan. I ate, slept and lived under the same roof with all the other members of that family. As part of that family, I knew I was safe, cared for and loved. I didn’t have to knock on the door every time I wanted to go into the house. I did not have to ask permission to be let in. I was not one of the neighbor kids wanting to weasel my way into having a place to sleep, having a place at the dinner table or being loved by a set of parents. No one ever asked me, “Who are you and what are you doing here?” As one of the Macek children, I was already loved, welcomed and accepted by my parents as one of their daughters.
There was never any doubt about where I belonged or to whom I belonged until something happened that tore the family apart; Dad’s suicide.

We all still belonged to the same family, but our family was no longer safe, loving, and cohesive. Instead, grief, silence and secrets kept us separated and isolated us from each other. I no longer knew to whom I belonged or where I belonged.

Consequently, I grew up on my own, yet still longing to belong. 

My sense of independence gave me pseudo confidence, even leading me to believe that I didn’t need anyone, that I didn’t need to belong.

Eventually though, I found myself at a crossroads. I had no desire to keep on living the way I was living. I only reaped misery. Consequently, the only other choice I saw was to take the route Dad had taken and end my life. 

But then, I was presented with another choice: One that took me by surprise, one that caught me off guard and yet made perfect sense. Consequently, I received and believed what Jesus offered me; an invitation to live a whole new life orchestrated and directed by him.

Since that pivotal moment in my life, I can say that I’ve become part of God’s clan, accepted, and welcomed into a new family. I know for certain this Father will never abandon me and nothing will separate or isolate me from the love of this Father.  

Why Bother?

Why bother knowing to whom we belong? We all long to belong. Knowing I belong to God assures me that I am perfectly accepted, perfectly loved and will never be abandoned ever again.

P.S.  I wrote the story of my journey to forgiveness for those who, like me, know they need to change, but are not quite sure where or how to start. You can find A Heart’s Journey To Forgiveness at Redemption Press and Amazon.