Discernment

Occasionally, I decline personal invitations. My decision to bow out of some event, conversation or gathering has everything to do with how I make decisions based on my discernment. Sometimes though, when I decline to participate in something with others, I am perceived as passing judgement. These days, words such as discernment and judgement, I think are getting a bad rap.

Judgement is a noun involving a legal decision or sentence. It also is the ability to weigh matters prudently. 

Discern, is a transitive verb, (an action verb that needs an object to complete its meaning). I cannot say, “I discern.” I have to also say what it is I discern. “I discern that the weather will be pleasant today.” 

Discern means to perceive with the mind. Discerning, an adjective, means discriminating, perceptive. Discernment, a noun, means discrimination, insight, perception. 

Synonyms for judge include, think, reckon, conclude, determine and deduce. 

Synonyms for the word discern include; perceive, observe, detect, determine, acknowledge, scrutinize and examine. All of us, throughout our day are perceiving, observing, detecting, determining, acknowledging, scrutinizing, discriminating, examining, interpreting, figuring out, forming opinions and weighing matters with wisdom. 

When I was the mom of young kids, I had to discern the health and well-being of my offspring on a daily basis; were they getting enough sleep, were they eating too many sweets, and how were they getting along with others? Assessing what I perceived, I made a judgement call on their behalf; more sleep, less sugar and time with different friends. 

As a wife I discern regularly how my husband is doing and again, make judgement calls based on what I observe he needs; conversation or time to ponder, dinner or a nap, the heating pad or just me.  

When I hear grunting or groaning while instructing a yoga class, I discriminate between those who know how to accommodate themselves in a pose and those who are just trying to get into a pose. 

Consequently, when I bow out of an event, conversation or gathering my conclusion to do so has everything to do with me, my standards and scruples. Which is why it is paramount for each of us to hone our skills of discernment by first knowing from where and from whom our standards and scruples originate from. 

Why Bother?

Why bother honing our skill of discernment? Knowing from where and from whom our standards and scruples originate from refine our skill of discernment giving us an unwavering confidence when we know we need to bow out.

P.S.  I wrote the story of my journey to forgiveness for those who, like me, know they need to change, but are not quite sure where to start. You can find A Heart’s Journey To Forgiveness at Redemption Press and Amazon.