When Did I Start So Going Fast?

As Thoreau once said, “If a man does not keep pace with his companions, perhaps it is because he hears a different drummer. Let him step to the music which he hears, however measured or far away.”

This quote has always made me wonder about the tempo I set for my life and how I am learning to alter that tempo to a slower one. 

My husband and I have different tempos. The pace he keeps, the tempo he follows, and the drumbeat he hears, is much different from mine. 

He is methodical, precise, and detail oriented. He is much more aware of who surrounds him when he is in public, pays close attention to the details of the landscape as he drives and notices the things inside or outside the house that need his attention. I’ve never seen him in a hurry to be somewhere, get somewhere or to leave somewhere. His tempo, pace, and cadence is steady, neither slow nor fast. 

Then there is me. When I am in public, I’ve got my eye on getting done what needs doing, not on the people who surround me. When driving my eyes are on the car ahead of me; the one that I want to pass. And I’ve been known to clean the house, only for my husband to point out the cobwebs in the corner. 

There was a time, as a kid, when I made a mental note of the different tempos of Mom and Dad. 

Dad’s pace seemed much more leisurely than Mom’s. When Dad sat down, he actually stayed seated whether it was eating dinner, smoking a cigarette or watching the news. And for a while, my rate actually matched his. 

Mom, on the other hand, only sat down momentarily before hopping back up to do something else; put more bread on the table, answer the phone, or check on the laundry. 

Mom’s tempo influenced me more than Dad’s simply because Dad’s influence in my life ended sooner than Mom’s.

But, Mom really is not the culprit. I do, after all, have a choice to not be hurried. 

Eliminating Hurry

Every season of life is a little different with some seasons busier than others. But exploring how we can live with less haste in whatever season of life we are presently living, begins with creative thinking and practice. 

While raising sons and homeschooling them, I noticed my need for less haste. I needed “down” time to think, to breathe and to reason. As a result, I instigated 30 minute siestas after lunch. We all went into the seclusion of our rooms to read a book, or take a nap. During those 30 minute siestas, I was never in a hurry for them to be over. As a matter of fact, those siestas were the only time in my day that I felt in sync with my body, breath and mind. 

As my sons grew older, I’d leave home without them, taking long leisurely walks away from their noise and commotion. 

Now, far past those child rearing years, yet still a responsible and employed adult,  I’m still finding creative ways to practice a less hurried pace. I walk instead of driving my car when possible. I acknowledge the people around me when I am in public and notice the cobwebs in the corners of my house. 

                                                                                                                                                              Why Bother?

Why bother noticing when we are hurrying? “Hurrying is the great enemy of spiritual life in our day,” says author Willard Dallas. To notice when we are hurrying is to notice our need to tune in to the tempo that matches the spiritual side of our lives.