Do Over

There are times in our lives when we get a do over. When the dice hits the floor instead of the board, we get a do over. When the yeast doesn’t “proof” we pour it down the drain and start again. Learning flip turns, I got a do over every time I came to the end of a lap. These are simple do overs. But what about the more complicated do overs?

For instance, what about those times we say something in anger, without even thinking? I’ve wanted to take back words such as those, but of course words cannot be unsaid, much less unheard. Wanting a redo in this case, one has to return to the person and make amends. A humbling, but necessary measure if we value the relationship. 

Though I’ve humbled myself many times, I have to say that it doesn’t get any easier returning to the scene of the crime to make amends. But I do know that eating humble pie is much better than pretending that what I said didn’t leave a welt, a scar or a divot in someone’s life.

It amazes me that I don’t always remember the details or the cause of a rift. But I do remember the feelings that come in the aftermath; tension, discomfort, and an underlying truth that I was wrong. 

Yet, we don’t have to recall the details. The factual information that caused the fissure or fraction of the relationship is unnecessary. What is imperative is that we know that what we’ve said caused harm. 

Asking for a do over is the same as asking someone to forgive us which may or may not work out. 

Ninety-five percent of the time when I’ve asked someone to forgive me it works out. But five percent of the time it doesn’t work out. In those cases, there is nothing for me to do, other than to not give up hope that someday I might be granted a do over.

Why Bother?

Why bother wanting a do over? No one is exempt from wanting a do over which makes us all vulnerable to eating humble pie. Even though it’s not easy, it is good for us.

P.S.  I wrote the story of my journey to forgiveness for those who need clarity when it comes to understanding forgiveness. You can find A Heart’s Journey To Forgiveness at Redemption Press and Amazon.