The Doorway of Our Past

We like to say, “What is past is past,” or “That’s water under the bridge.” Yet, I think that, “Sometimes we have to jimmy the doorway of our past to understand our present,” is more apt when talking about days gone by.

I get to teach adult swimming lessons. I really like teaching adults how to swim. Sometimes they just need a little encouragement to get themselves into the water on a regular basis in order to refine their format. Sometimes they need to know how to build their endurance and other times they need to face an old, and crippling fear of the water.

At the beginning of every lesson, I ask each of my students to tell me about their back story with the water. At least one in every three have had some kind of a traumatic event such as a near drowning experience. Understandably, their fear kept them from learning how to swim. But now they are ready and willing to learn. 

One man told me the story of how his step father would repeatedly throw him into the water. His step father did so because it was his way of teaching his step son to either sink or swim. The young boy sank every time. Now as an adult, he wanted to learn how to swim.

My coaching technique with this man included having him swim lap after lap after lap using a kick board, flippers and a flotation device around his waist. I told him his practice was to simply find his rhythm of breath and allow his body to make peace with the water. 

He just smiled the first time I told him this. But the second time when he came back and completed another lesson, he actually smiled, understood and agreed with me.

He experienced this truth for himself; he’d never learn to swim without using his body. And his body was not going to cooperate with him until it felt safe. 

As much as we’d like to think that our past does not matter, it does. As much as we’d like to think our past does not influence us today, it does. But here is the good news.

Although we’ve all suffered in some way shape or form from something in our past, we don’t have to allow it to remain a present, powerful and debilitating force. Instead, we can reframe or learn from our past. 

What took place with my student who was afraid of the water because of his past experience? He realized how much he’s lived disassociated from his body; ignoring what it told him.

Today, he is a better swimmer because he is no longer detached from his body. Instead, he’s learned how to make peace between his body, his mind and the water. 

Why Bother?

Why bother jimmying the doorway of our past? Jimmying the doorway of our past opens us to understanding our present. 

P. S.  I wrote the story of my journey to forgiveness for those who need clarity when it comes to understanding forgiveness. You can find A Heart’s Journey To Forgiveness at Redemption Press and Amazon.