Receiving Love

Without the help from the pastor who presided over our wedding, I could not have said my wedding vows. But, as he cut the words into bite sized pieces for us to repeat, we said the traditional vows to each other: “To be my wedded husband to have and to hold from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, till death do us part.” 

I didn’t know the full scope of the words I repeated because I was drunk with giddy emotions. This man, to whom I was being wed, was becoming my husband. This man to whom I was being wed wanted me. This man to whom I was being wed was taking me as his wife. I was swept up in the emotional wonder of it all.

Then, after the kiss, after the cake, after the commotion of well wishers, we settled down and got to know each other’s idiosyncrasies. 

Some of his character traits that had first attracted me to him, were not quite as attractive as I’d first thought.

His quietness was no longer a mystery. It was actually quite irksome. 

His manliness was not so attractive, especially when he took off his boots after a long day on a construction job.

And his sensitivity toward me, well let’s just say I didn’t feel it as intensely as I once had.  So what changed? 

Living with each other 24/7, we became intimately acquainted with each other’s habits, needs, moods, and the complexity of understanding who we were as individuals. No wonder wedding vows include the phrase; “until death do us part.”

It takes a long time to really know one another. 

Something that has never wavered with my husband in all the forty-six years of our marriage is his love for me. 

At first, my husband’s love was too hard for me to believe. But, that was no mystery to him. He knew that about me. He knew my back story. He knew I’d been betrayed by my father. He knew how my father’s suicide made it hard for me to trust. But, knowing all he knew, didn’t stop him from loving me. And the longer he’s loved me, the easier it has become for me to be the recipient of his love.

Now, I am no longer drunk on giddy emotions. Now I’m grounded in love. Now I cherish, appreciate, admire, nurture and support the one I am wedded to. 

Why Bother?

Why bother receiving love? Love is a transforming power. Take it from one who has been transformed by it.